


More Broken

by maycollins



Category: Legacies (TV 2018), The Vampire Diaries & Related Fandoms, The Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Like so much angst, i stan the saltzman twins, maybe eventually happy ending though, vampire lizzie
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-11
Updated: 2019-06-06
Packaged: 2019-10-26 01:00:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 13,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17736023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maycollins/pseuds/maycollins
Summary: ON HIATUS UNTIL THE SHOW RETURNS IN OCTOBER (but I promise, I’ll be back then!)Lizzie thought she was as broken as they come; she gets paranoid and has meltdowns and hurts people she cares about. Now that she's a vampire, she's starting to realize that she didn't know just how broken a person can be.Josie has dedicated so much of her energy to looking after her sister, and now that Lizzie is a vampire, it's even harder. To be there for the person she loves most in the world, she's going to need to learn to lean on someone else.





	1. Chapter 1

Bright lights came into focus along with Josie’s worried face and stabs of hunger sharper than anything Lizzie had ever experienced. She tried to raise her head, but a wave of dizziness passed over her. She felt like she’d been hit by a truck, multiple times.

 

“What happened?” she scratched through a dry mouth.

 

Her dad, sitting on the side of her bed opposite Josie, took her hand in his.

 

“Can we have the room?”

  
Josie nodded and ushered out the small crowd that had gathered in the infirmary of the Salvatore School, MG and Rafael and Kaleb and Landon, and much to Lizzie’s annoyance, even Hope.

 

“Another monster attacked. You got hurt.”

 

Her dad’s voice was strained, and memories started materializing. It had been a hydra this time, slithering from the woods to the fields where the youngest students were playing. She’d been watching them when she saw it in the distance and had called for help before going after it herself.

 

She had thought she could be a hero, protect the kids, protect the school, make her dad proud. 

 

    She had thought that Hope could probably do it, so she should also be able to.

 

She had thought she could throw spells at it, or maybe even siphon its power.

 

She hadn’t really thought at all.

 

Before she was close enough to try siphoning or her mind clear enough to cast a spell, she was caught in the sharp teeth of the monster. There was searing pain, then she was flung to the ground, and blackness overtook her.

 

“Hope got to you first and gave you her blood. Your wounds healed, but you didn’t wake up.”

 

His grip on her hand tightened as he took a shaky breath.

 

Lizzie thought she might be catching on, that she might understand this intense hunger she was feeling, or why she could see the pulse in her dad’s neck so vividly, but she hoped beyond anything that there was some plot twist coming, that there was a better explanation.

 

“The hydra injected you with some kind of venom when it bit you, and even vampire blood couldn’t burn it away.”

 

The blood in Lizzie’s veins was rushing too fast, her heart beating too hard. She wanted to scream, but clenched her fists instead. Even when her nails broke the skin on her palm, she couldn’t make her breathing even.

 

Reaching across the bed for her other hand, her dad met her eyes. His gaze was watery, but calm.

 

“Can you breathe with me, Lizzie?”

 

She nodded, matching their breathing until she felt the darkness loosen its grip on her heart.

 

“Okay, I’m ready,” she whispered.

 

“You died. With Hope’s blood in your system. You have a day to drink blood and become a vampire or -” he cut off before he could finish, his voice too thick to continue.

 

He didn’t have to; Lizzie had to drink blood or she would die.

 

“Is mom coming?” She hated how weak her voice sounded.

 

“She’s getting in tonight, so you can have a chance to talk before you… decide.”

 

Tears burned behind her eyes, and once again, she felt a scream building, so strong she didn’t think breathing would stop it this time.

 

“Can I be alone?” she asked.

 

“Of course.”

 

Her dad left just before the scream broke, shattering all the glass in the room as a shockwave rippled from her.

 

She was used to this, people called them her “episodes” or “breakdowns” or other meaner things that she pretended not to hear. She had been broken for so long that she was used to it, used to the crescendo of feeling so intense that it completely controlled her until it peaked, and she did something bad, and then it was over, and she was back in control and able to breathe again.

 

This time was different, though. This time, the feeling didn’t end; it wasn’t one wave crashing, but an entire ocean drowning her in sadness and fear and rage, and she screamed until her throat was sore, flung her magic until the room was in shambles and there was nothing left to break.

 

Then she sunk to the ground, too tired to stand, and stayed there.

 

~oOo~

 

If it wasn’t enough to hear Lizzie’s pain from outside her room, the screams, and the crash of furniture, and the sobs that occasionally tore out of her, Josie could also feel it. She wasn’t sure if it was a normal twin thing, or a special gemini coven siphon witch twin thing, but Lizzie’s pain rippled through Josie in waves.

 

She’d always been able to feel Lizzie, like a special sixth sense, but it was usually muted. She would know Lizzie was hurting, but the feeling would be separate from her own, and easy to ignore if she ever wanted to, though she never did.

 

Now, it felt more powerful that any of her own emotions ever had, so powerful it masked her own feelings, so all there was was Lizzie.

 

She was shaking, could feel her blood going cold, her head spinning, black spots appearing in her vision. She thought she might throw up, or faint.

 

“Maybe you should sit.” Hope put one hand on her waist, the other on her elbow, and guided her to the ground, sitting cross-legged beside her.

 

“I can feel her,” she gasped between breaths.

 

“I can do a spell to temporarily loosen the connection.”

 

Josie shook her head. “No. I need to know.”

 

Hope was silent, but she made no move to leave, and Josie was unspeakably grateful for that. Her dad was pacing the hallway, too worried to offer any relief, and Hope’s presence beside her was a calming one.

 

A stronger wave of pain passed through Josie, and on instinct, she reached for Hope’s hand, clutching it so tightly that if it weren’t for the other girl’s tribred nature, she was sure it would have hurt. She couldn’t quite put words to the sensations that were sending her reeling because there were too many feelings mixed together and shuffling around, so intense that they felt like physical pain.

 

If this was what Lizzie felt during her episodes, it now made sense to Josie why she acted the way she did.

 

“Maybe just a calming spell,” Hope suggested. “It won’t fix it, but it will take the edge off.”

 

Josie felt Hope’s hand, the one that wasn’t still clenched in her own, brushing soothing paths down her hair.

 

She tried to agree, but another burst of emotion had tears clouding her vision and sparks shooting from her fingertips. Instead of dropping her electrified hand, Hope held it tighter.

 

“Do the spell,” she choked out when the worst of it had passed.

 

Hope began to whisper in a language Josie probably would have recognized had her mind been less cluttered, and a warmth flowed into her from their still connected hands. Even the incantation sounded soothing coming from Hope.

 

When she could finally breathe again, Josie felt her eyelids begin to droop. She hadn’t slept since the attack, waiting for Lizzie to wake up, and now exhaustion was filling in all the places where Lizzie’s feelings had receded. She let her head fall onto Hope’s shoulder, and sleep quickly took her.

 

~oOo~

 

Hope had learned not to be mad at  _ this  _ Lizzie.

 

She’d separated the girl in her mind.

 

There was the Lizzie that need to be the center of everyone’s attention, and didn’t care who fell into her shadow or what that might mean for them. Hope  _ hated _ that Lizzie.

 

There was the Lizzie who truly loved Josie and wanted to protect people, especially her family. Hope respected that Lizzie.

 

There was the Lizzie who was prone to emotional outbursts and did everything she could to keep her own darkness contained. Hope understood that Lizzie.

 

She knew she had no right to be upset at Lizzie’s reaction to today. Vampires felt things more intensely than humans, and Lizzie was already as intense as a person could get. Add that on to the trauma of literally being killed by a mythological monster, and of finding out that one way or another, her life as she knew it was going to be over, and Lizzie was actually handling the news relatively well.

 

Still, Hope’s blood boiled when she felt Josie twitch in her sleep, likely rammed by another of Lizzie’s emotions. Although the other girl had been unconscious for an hour now, Hope continued to pet her hair.

 

It wasn’t fair that Josie should always suffer because of Lizzie, whether she was being pushed into the background or overwhelmed with feelings that weren’t her own.

 

Alaric finally stopped his pacing and noticed the girls on the floor.

 

“What happened here?”

 

“I think vampirism sent their twin bond into overdrive,” Hope answered. “It’s like Lizzie’s feelings completely took Josie over.”

 

“Shit.” he sighed and scrubbed his hands down his face.

 

“I did a calming spell, and she fell asleep.”

 

“Are you okay here with them until Caroline gets in?”

 

“Of course-” she wanted to say more, but he was already off down the hallway.

 

~oOo~

 

Alaric knew he wasn’t a perfect parent, but he thought he’d gotten pretty good at raising siphon witch twins, relatively speaking. He’d even finally started adjusting to it without Caroline. While she was trying to save their girls from the merge, he’d been dealing with Lizzie’s meltdowns and Josie’s studies. He’d been protecting them from monsters, and trying to keep as much stability as possible in their lives.

 

This was too much.

 

Lizzie was going to be a vampire. He didn’t let himself consider the alternative; he’d force feed her a blood bag if he had to.

 

He didn’t know what that meant for Lizzie’s emotions, or Josie’s. He didn’t know what it meant for the merge.

 

He sat down and let out a growl of frustration, shoving a pile of papers from his desk to the floor. When that didn’t make him feel better, he took the bourbon that was always stored in his bottom drawer and swigged directly from the bottle.


	2. Chapter 2

 Caroline didn’t know what she was walking into, but she knew it wasn’t going to be good. As much as she and Lizzie had worked on practicing coping skills when they were last together, it was clear that her daughter was getting worse.

 

    It seemed like every few days now Alaric was calling with another monster or another meltdown, and all she wanted every time was to come back to the Salvatore School and make it better. It was all she could do each day to not hop on the next flight back to Virginia, but she knew the girls needed a solution to the merge more than they needed her with them.

 

    Until now.

 

    She’d been on her way out of a fruitless meeting with a witch in Prague when Alaric had called her panicked, saying that Lizzie had been hurt in an attack, and that she wasn’t waking up. It took fifteen minutes, and a panic attack of her own, before Caroline found out that her daughter had vampire blood in her system.

 

    They still believed she might heal, or that one of the witches working in the infirmary might know a way to cure the poison, or that it might work its way through her on its own, but Caroline was already on her way to the airport.

 

    She had boarded, though the flight had not yet taken off, when Alaric texted to say that Lizzie had died, and that he’d get in touch when she rose.

 

    It didn’t matter that Caroline knew that Lizzie was only technically dead, that being a vampire didn’t have to be an ending, just reading the words was the most painful thing Caroline had ever done, worse than watching her mom die or hearing Stephan’s last message to her.

 

    She and Alaric had founded the Salvatore school to give their kids a place to be safe, and it had already gotten one of them killed, if only temporarily.

 

    She’d cried nearly the whole plane ride, hating that she had to be taking it. All she’d wanted for months was to come home to her family, but not at such a high cost.

 

    Now she stood at the end of the hallway, just able to make out Josie slumped against Hope in the dim lighting, beside a door that she knew Lizzie must be behind.

 

    She had dried her tears and held her back straight, ready to be the comforting and knowledgeable mom that at the moment, she felt completely incapable of being.

 

    Hope nudged Josie as Caroline approached, and she blinked a few times before standing up, then swayed for a second when she was finally on her feet. Caroline rushed to her side to steady her, then wrapped her daughter tightly in her arms.

 

    Josie only stayed like that for a moment before pushing her away.

 

    “I’m fine, Mom. Just the twin bond acting up. Go to Lizzie.”

 

    Caroline pulled her briefly back in.

 

    “I love you so much,” she said as she pulled away.

 

    “I love you too, Mom.” Josie rolled her eyes, and for a moment, it felt normal.

 

    Then she opened the door.

 

~oOo~

 

    Lizzie wished she could say she’d lost track of time in all the pain and chaos, that she didn’t know how long she’d been sitting on the cold floor, tracing the cracks in the walls, but she was hyper aware of the passage of time. Even with the sun blocked out with thick curtains, she could tell it had set and that night was quickly rolling in.

 

    Before the door opened, revealing her Mom illuminated in the light from the hallway like a guardian angel, Lizzie had heard her steps down the hallway, her interaction with Josie. She had smelled the blood bag she carried.

 

    “Mom?” the question came out a sob.

 

    Caroline was at her side in an instant. She held her hand tightly, but didn’t initiate any further contact, like she knew that would be too much for Lizzie right now, that all the sounds and smells and sights were already too much without adding another sense to the mix.

 

    “I’m here.”

 

    “I’m so hungry.”

 

    “I know. I have blood, whenever you’re ready.”

 

    At the same time as the thought of it was revolting to her, her whole body screamed to accept it. She hated that, the way she wasn’t in control of what she wanted anymore, that she knew if her mom took the blood bag out, there was nothing that could stop her from drinking from it.

 

    “I can’t do it.”

 

    Her mom smoothed her hair down. “You can. It won’t be easy; trust me, I know all the ways it’s not easy, but you are so strong. And you have so many people who are going to help you.”

 

    Lizzie shook her head, and felt magic like static crackling through her hair. “I was already a monster. I tried so hard not to be, but I can’t control it sometimes. And now, it’s like that on steroids.”

 

    “You have never been a monster, and this doesn’t change that. We’ll keep working on control. We’ll try new things until something sticks. Just because it’s going to be hard doesn’t mean your life has to be over. I won’t let it.”

 

    “But-”

 

    “Imagine if I let my life end when I became a vampire. I wouldn’t have gone to college, wouldn’t have had you, wouldn’t have gotten married, wouldn’t have started this school. You have so much ahead of you too.”

 

    “Okay,” Lizzie agreed weakly. There was no point arguing with her mom, no use pointing out that _she_ hadn't been an out of control witch, already too familiar with the darkness. Lizzie wanted to live; she was just scared of what that might mean, but she'd never been one to let fear stop her. “I’ll take the blood now.”

 

    Her mom pulled the bag from her purse. It was different from the ones all vampires at this school drank from, human blood instead of the animal mix that kept them from losing control. Only human blood would complete the transition. She passed it to Lizzie like this was normal, like it was one of the juice pouches she used to love when she was a kid.

 

    She took a long drink from it, imagining it _was_ a juice box. She’d always expected that blood tasted different to vampires, but this tasted the same as when she’d pricked a finger and put it in her mouth to stop the bleeding. It was metallic and salty and a little gross, but she loved it. She wanted more.

 

    She felt the skin under her eyes prickle as she emptied the bag, and magic gathered in her hands. She could hear the students talking across the school and smell the dinner leftovers and see everything in the dark room and feel the magic coursing like blood through her veins.

 

    She was strength and power and magic, rolled into a girl. Her mom had been right; she wasn’t a monster; she was a god.

 

~oOo~

 

    Josie stared at her bedroom door. Hope had helped her to her room and left for the night, and after doing everything to get ready for bed, Josie just couldn’t sleep. She’d spent plenty of nights apart from her twin, nights when she had been dating Penelope or when Lizzie had snuck out to see whatever boy she was interested in at the moment, but never like this.

 

    When anything bad happened, since they were kids, they had spent the night side by side where they could protect each other. It didn’t matter if the threat was a monster or a distracted father or a boy’s rejection, they stayed together.

 

    Now, she sat, legs crossed and thought about texting Hope to keep her company while she waited. The other girl had a comforting influence, and not just because of her calming spells.

 

    Josie couldn’t bring herself to do that, though. If Lizzie came back to their room to find Hope, she would be pissed. Her day had been hard enough already without forcing her to worry that Hope was replacing her in her sister’s life as well as her father’s.

 

    Instead, she paced.

 

    It was just after 11 when the door to their room burst open and Lizzie strode through, looking as chipper as when she’d hooked up with Rafael. Josie was too taken aback by her demeanor to react to her arrival, and Lizzie took full advantage of the silence.

 

    “You have no idea how awesome this is, Josie. I can _feel_ the magic in me. And Hope might be a tribred, but right now, she’s only _really_ werewolf and witch, and since I’m vampire and witch now, I’m basically just as impressive as her. I mean, I always have been, but now even Dad will see it. Do you think he’ll start training me to fight? Or maybe Mom can now that she’s back. Things are really looking up for me, Josie.”

 

    She collapsed onto her bed dramatically, laughter replacing her words.

 

    Josie could feel her euphoria leaking through the twin bond, and found herself laughing as well. When the laughter faded, she saw that Lizzie had fallen asleep, and she was finally able to as well.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I rewatched the episode of TVD where Caroline turned to gather some inspiration, and I'm about halfway through my first time watching the Originals, so I just got to an episode where another person turns, and that influenced this chapter a lot.  
> As before, comment! Comments bring me so much joy, and sometimes even inspiration.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay with this chapter. I was finishing the last two seasons of the Originals so I had more background on Hope

Hope didn’t usually feel like a vampire. Aside from her blood, she wasn't one. She didn’t have the same strength or invulnerability or need to drink blood to stay alive.

 

Seeing Lizzie at the head of the vampires’ table, talking and laughing like she’d been there all along, Hope felt like a full tribred, which of course, meant she felt even more of an outsider than ever.

 

She’d only turned one person before, other than when she was a baby or when her blood was taken from her, and that hadn’t gone well. Lizzie seemed temporarily fine, but Hope had known her since they were children, and she doubted it would last.

 

Before she had time to follow that concerning train of thought, Josie plopped down across from her, grinning more widely than the typically reserved girl usually did.

 

”You’re in a strangely good mood for someone who’s twin just became a vampire.”

 

“You see her over there, she’s great. So, there’s a Mystic Falls food festival in town today, and Dad said we can go, so if you want to come…”

 

“Since when are you into town events?”

 

Josie shrugged. “So do you want to join? You can bring Landon.”

 

“Yeah, sure. Sounds fun.”

 

“Great!”

 

Hope expected Josie to get up and join the witches, but she picked up her sandwich and started eating. Hope opened her chips, and they ate in comfortable silence.

 

It was still surreal to her that she didn’t eat alone anymore. Until people knew her true history, she’d been welcome with the witches, but that had been years ago, and it was only recently that had changed. Now she found Landon or Rafael or Josie by her side more often than she didn’t.

 

She didn’t know the etiquette for having friends at lunch. Were they supposed to be talking while they ate, and was she supposed to say goodbye when she was done?

 

She settled for an awkward wave as she got up for chemistry class.

 

“Meet in the Hall at 4?” Josie asked.

 

“Yeah.”

 

~oOo~

 

“Come on Dad,” Lizzie argued. “I’m fine, and I’ve been looking forward to this all week.”

 

“I just don’t think it’s a very good idea. You haven’t even been a vampire for a full day, and there’s a lot of temptation out there.”

 

“Josie will be there, and Hope. I’ll be perfectly safe.” When it looked like her dad was about to argue, she added, “And so will all the human residents of Mystic Falls.”

He sighed. “Okay, but if anything at all happens, call me or your mom right away.”

 

Lizzie jumped up and wrapped her arms around her dad. “Thank you Daddy!”

 

There was just enough time to go back to her room and change out of her uniform before it was time for everyone to leave, then she headed to the Hall where Josie and MG were already waiting.

 

“Just waiting for Hope, Landon, and Rafael!” Josie chirped. She was still wearing her uniform, but Lizzie decided not to comment on that.

 

“Did someone slip happy pills into your lunch?” she asked instead.

 

“Why is it so strange that I’m happy?”

 

“I mean, the last time you were like this, it was because of a mind control slug.”

 

“Oh look, the rest of our friends,” Josie signalled the end of the conversation at the arrival of the rest of the group.

 

Hope and Landon were holding hands, and Rafael trailed behind, staring with unconcealed longing at Hope. Lizzie had really dodged a bullet with Rafael; the last thing she wanted was to be in a love triangle with  _ Hope _ of all people.

 

Hope, like Josie, was still wearing her uniform.

 

“Really representing the Salvatore School there,” Lizzie commented, infusing as much disdain as she could into the statement.

 

Hope rolled her eyes. “Could you just try being nice?”

 

“Not in my nature.”

 

They piled into her dad’s car, Hope driving and Josie in shotgun.

 

“Why does Hope get to drive?” Lizzie complained, more to annoy Hope than because she actually cared. She personally hated driving, and it didn’t much matter who was at the wheel as long as it wasn’t her.

 

“She’s the only one old enough to drive passengers,” Josie said.

 

“Can you turn on the radio?”

 

“It’s like a five minute drive, can you just be quiet that long?” Hope asked, pulling out of the long driveway from the school.

 

Lizzie found herself silent, even as Rafael and Landon started talking about what food they wanted to try first and MG started to explain the comic book he’d just finished to Josie.

 

It didn’t feel like she  _ couldn’t  _ talk, more like she didn’t want to, even though she logically knew she did. When the van pulled into the parking lot by the common where the festival was taking place, and Landon opened first his own door, then Hope’s, like he was some medieval knight escorting a princess from her carriage, she felt her desire to speak return.

 

“Josie, let’s go get burritos.” She pulled her sister from the car.

 

“Actually, Hope and I were-”

 

“Josie!” she insisted, and Josie met Hope’s eyes and shrugged apologetically as she followed Lizzie to the stand of Mexican food.

 

In truth, Lizzie didn’t particularly want Mexican food, but the guy serving it was gorgeous, and completely her type, and she could get food anywhere, but new boys were hard to come by at the Salvatore School.

 

She was having fun flirting, pretending to eat, and exchanging knowing looks with Josie whenever the boy, Todd, as she learned his name was, said anything funny or interesting. The sun was beginning to set, meaning their curfew, and the end of the festival, was coming up, and she hadn’t tried any of the other stalls or samples, but she didn’t mind.

 

“Can I steal Josie for a bit?” Hope asked.

 

“Sure,” Lizzie found herself saying before even processing the question.

 

Josie only looked surprised for a second before turning away with Hope.

 

~oOo~

 

“Sorry to take you away from that riveting encounter.” Hope’s voice dripped with sarcasm, and Josie laughed.

 

She knew there was something unnatural about the joy infecting her today, could feel it seeping through the twin bond from Lizzie’s manic energy, but she was going to enjoy it while it lasted.

 

“She’s only like this because she’s insecure. She thinks if she goes up to a boy she likes alone, he’ll think she’s weird or she’ll say something wrong.”

 

“You don’t need to defend her. I get it.”

 

“So did you just come to save me from watching Lizzie flirting the whole night, or did you want something?”

 

“Your company isn’t enough?” Hope laughed, and Josie heard a trace of her old self filter through it, a trace of the girl she’d known as Hope Marshall, who was an ordinary witch with two living parents, a love of painting, and an earnestness Josie wasn’t used to. She now knew parts of that girl had never quite been real, but she wished Hope could still have that same lightness sometimes.

 

“I did actually have an ulterior motive,” Hope confessed. “I wanted you to try some beignets. They’re not as good as the ones in New Orleans, but you can never go wrong with beignets.”

 

There was that laugh again.

 

Josie grinned.

 

“So what happened to Landon? Does he have something against fried dough with sugar?”

 

“He and Raf are bro-ing out over some kind of steak. And I wanted to hang out with you.”

 

Josie ignored the way that made her heart flutter. She’d had a crush on Hope before, and all it had led to was awkwardness and conflict with her sister, and now she was even more unavailable. They were finally friends, and Josie wasn’t going to ruin that with these feelings that were suddenly coming back up.

 

She had to admit, the beignet was delicious, and joking around with Hope was a lot more fun than watching Lizzie steal some townie’s heart. Of course she loved her sister more than anything in the world, and would do anything to make her happy, but it felt nice not to be standing in her shadow for a change.

 

When they finished their beignets, Josie noticed a bubble tea cart, and she didn’t even have to ask before Hope was walking with her toward it and commenting how basic Mystic Falls had become. Josie teased that she knew Hope was secretly a basic white girl too, and they laughed together over their boba until MG fetched them to head back to school.

 

Everyone except Lizzie was by the van when they made their way over.

 

“Where’s Lizzie?” Hope asked.

 

“I thought she’d be with you guys,” Rafael said.

 

“In case you hadn’t noticed, she kind of hates me.”

 

“I’ll go look for her,” Josie announced, a bad feeling blooming in her chest. Perhaps it had been there all along, and she was too distracted by Hope to notice.

 

“Wait-” MG put his hand out to stop her.

 

“I smell it too,” Rafael said.

 

Josie’s heart sped up. “What is it?”

 

Hope put a calming hand on her shoulder. “We can smell blood.”

 

“Where?” Josie was already bracing herself to run.

 

“C’mon,” Hope led the way past the festival and down an alley where two people were barely visible in the dark. To any outsider, it just looked like they were making out, and knowing Lizzie, that was probably how it had started.

 

“Lizzie?” Josie called out, but her sister didn’t answer.

 

They got closer, and it was clear what Lizzie was doing, drinking from the neck of the boy she’d been talking to earlier. The boy was unconscious, and Josie couldn’t make herself get closer. What if he was dead? What if her twin had killed an innocent guy?

 

Hope continued approaching.

 

“Lizzie!” she commanded. “Let him go!”

 

As if hypnotized, Lizzie took a step back, and the boy fell to the ground. She turned to face Josie, and although she had stopped feeding, the dark veins around her eyes still pulsed, and her mouth was covered in blood. Josie sucked in a breath and reminded herself this was her twin, that they’d shared a bedroom their whole life, that they’d comforted each other’s broken hearts.

 

“I’m sorry,” Lizzie stammered. “Is he… I didn’t mean to do anything.”

 

Hope felt his wrist for his pulse. “He’s alive. MG will heal and compel him. You need to calm down before anyone else gets hurt.”

 

Lizzie’s face returned to normal, she took a visible deep breath. “Why did that work? Why do I feel calm?”

 

“We’ll talk about it back at school,”  Hope said. “Let’s get to the car.”

 

There were so many emotions running through Josie, her own panic, still not receding, Lizzie’s unnatural calm, guilt at leaving her sister alone, but mixed into them was a deep appreciation of Hope taking the lead and knowing what to do.

 

Despite being a powerful siphoner witch, Josie still felt like a lost and confused kid, and Hope was so much more than that.

 

“MG, meet as back at the van,” Hope added as they left the alley. She passed Lizzie a napkin to wipe the blood from her face, and it was like nothing had happened at all. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll mention here that this is only true to canon of episodes that came out before this story started. Anything after that, I'll choose whether to take or leave. For instance [small spoiler ahead], I obviously took the mention in the last episode of Josie's former crush on Hope, but I left behind basically everything else from the episode. I really want to explore Hope and Lizzie's conflict more, and the show seems like it's starting to resolve it, so I'm going to ignore that.


	4. Chapter 4

    Bickering had become the soundtrack of Alaric’s life as a father and headmaster. First Lizzie and Josie as children, and when they’d finally grown old enough to start taking the same side, Hope had shown up, and all hope of quiet had gone out the window.

 

He loved them all, loved his job, loved this school, but was a little peace here and there really too much to ask for?

 

“I can’t be sired to  _ Hope, _ ” Lizzie insisted. “A sire bond is based on love, and I’m obviously not in love with her. I don’t even  _ like _ her.”

 

“Thanks.” Hope rolled her eyes.

 

“We know the sire bond is different with werewolf hybrids; it’s probably also different for witches,” Caroline pointed out calmly.

 

Lizzie crossed her arms across her chest and huffed. “Well figure out a way to get rid of it. I’m not doing everything Hope says.”

 

“Seemed pretty handy when you almost killed that boy,” Hope said, starting another round of arguing.

 

Ric sighed. “Girls,” he said sharply.

 

Hope and Lizzie went silent.

 

Josie, who until this point had been sitting between the other girls quiet and slightly uncomfortable, spoke up. “Before we left for the festival, Hope asked Lizzie to be nice, and she didn’t listen.”

 

Lizzie shot her a glare. “I get it; I’m a bitch.”

 

“No, I mean, you didn’t do what she said.”

 

“Hmmm,” Ric considered. “Hope, tell Lizzie to do something.”

 

“What?” Lizzie turned her glare to him, but he was unfazed. He’d been on the end of Lizzie’s anger many times before, and he’d be on it many times more.

 

“Go on.”

 

Hope had the decency to look a little sorry before saying, “Lizzie, leave this office.”

 

Lizzie was still then let out a gleeful laugh. “No,” she said.

 

“Why didn’t that work?” Hope asked.

 

It was Josie who answered. “The sire bond doesn’t affect her inside the school.”

 

Ric nodded. “I’ll start looking into why. For now, as long as you stay in the school, you can go on ignoring Hope.” He directed the last part at Lizzie.

 

The girls stood to leave, but Caroline stopped Lizzie with a hand on her wrist. “We have more to talk about.”

 

The boy Lizzie attacked. Ric had known he shouldn’t have let his daughter out so soon, but she’d convinced him that she could handle it, and he’d wanted to believe her, wanted to believe that his little girl wouldn’t have to suffer or struggle because of what she’d become.

 

Josie glanced back like she wanted to stay, but Alaric shook his head, and she left with Hope.

 

~oOo~

 

“I liked the way you took control back there at the festival,” Josie said as they walked away from Dr. Saltzman’s office.

 

“I come from a family of leaders,” Hope chuckled nervously.

 

She hadn’t even really been processing what was happening as she made Lizzie step away from the boy and got MG to clean it up. She’d been acting on pure instinct, but now that the moment had passed, she couldn’t stop replaying the scene in her mind, blood dripping down Lizzie’s face and staining her yellow crop top brown, the boy collapsing to the concrete.

 

Henry, the only other person she’d knowingly turned, had lost control like that too, had killed a vampire in his bloodlust, and triggered a war in the process.

 

She was from a family of leaders, but the image seared into her mind of the dark veins pulsing under Lizzie’s skin reminded her that she was also from a family of monsters. With that kind of history, what kind of legacy could she bring but darkness and destruction.

 

“Hey, are you okay?” Josie’s soft voice at her side grounded her.

 

“I’m just sorry about what I did to your sister,” she said.

 

Josie stopped short and turned to face her, blocking her from continuing down the hallway.

 

“If you hadn’t given her your blood, Lizzie would be dead. How can you be sorry about that?”

 

“Someone else could have turned her, MG maybe. Destruction doesn’t follow him like it follows me.”

 

Josie took her hands and forced her to make eye contact.

 

“Lizzie was a siphoner witch prone to emotional outbursts who is now a vampire hybrid. What she does is because of who she is, not because of you. You saved her today from doing something she would never be able to undo. Despite everything she’s put you through, you keep saving her. Don’t be sorry.”

 

Josie’s eyes were wide and a deep brown color, and the look she was giving was so open and genuine that Hope didn’t want to look away.

 

“Thank you,” she whispered.

 

Josie nodded and took a step back.

 

“Anyway, it’s been a long day.” A stab of disappointment took Hope by surprise at the thought that Josie was about the suggest they go to bed. “MG invited me to watch a movie with him and Kaleb, and I know you’ll be welcome too.”

 

Hope laughed at the rush of relief, and Josie gave her a strange look.

 

“Yeah, that sounds really nice actually.”

 

Josie’s smile at her agreement made Hope’s heart flutter.

 

~oOo~

 

Lizzie didn’t know whether to argue or cry or act like nothing had happened and everything was fine. Their conversation with Hope and Josie had mostly centered on the sire bond, but what she’d just done had been on repeat in her mind since she stepped into the school.

 

She’d been normal and fine, flirting with a hot townie until his shift was over, then pressing him against the alley wall with her new vampire strength, kissing him until the rest of the world disappeared. Since she turned, she’d been thrumming with energy, desperate to be released, and this boy had been the perfect outlet.

 

Just kissing had never felt so good before; everywhere their bodies connected, Lizzie’s veins had been on fire. She was in tune to every subtle sound he made, every shift of position, every reaction he had to her touch. She could only imagine how incredible sex as a vampire would be.

 

Too soon, her senses had overwhelmed her. His heart rate had increased as his breathing sped up, and her desire for him had given way to desire for the blood rushing through his body. Her instinct had taken over, and all she had been aware of was the warmth and coppery taste of his blood on her tongue.

 

She’d felt like she would never be able to get enough of it, like she could drink forever and always crave more, but the bliss of it filling her up, not just with sustenance, but with power and magic as well, made it all worth it.

 

If Hope hadn’t found her, Lizzie knew she would have killed him, and what made it worse was that with his blood coursing through her, heating her from the inside out, it was hard to regret what she’d done.

 

Losing control made sense to her; she’d done it all the time as a witch, but she’d never  _ enjoyed _ that loss of control before. She’d been a disaster, but it was clear to her that now she was so much worse than that.

 

“I’m so sorry. Lock me in the dungeon; I deserve it. I’m horrible.”

 

The windows were rattling in their frames, and Lizzie knew it was her magic preparing to burst from her in a spectacular display, but she couldn’t make it stop, like she couldn’t stop the guilt and pleasure from warring inside her.

 

Her mom placed a reassuring hand on her back, but she barely felt it.

 

Her dad’s voice sounded like it was coming from underwater as he mentioned getting Emma to bring over something to dampen her magic.

 

“We’re not punishing you,” he told her when he’d finished calling Emma. “We want to help.”

 

“And you’re not horrible. I hurt people when I was first turned too,” her mom added. “It’s going to take some time to adjust, but you can learn to manage it. I promise.”

 

Lizzie nodded, but the lights in the room flickered, sparked, and went dark as another wave of magic rolled out of her.

 

She saw her parents exchange a look, and her dad crouched on the floor in front of her so he was at eye level, taking her hands. 

 

    “Let’s do the meditation we’ve been working on while we wait for Emma,” he said.

 

    Lizzie tried her best to focus on just her breathing and her dad’s voice and her mom still rubbing calming circles on her back, and though it helped a little, she could still feel the energy cresting and breaking inside her, occasionally escaping to shake the room or knock something off a shelf, and she heard her dad’s sigh of relief when Emma knocked on the door.

 

    She brought a delicate silver necklace with a heart pendant that she said would keep Lizzie from doing any magic while she wore it, and Lizzie let her mom fasten it around her neck without complaining at it’s lack of style, too grateful that she at least couldn’t hurt anyone that way.

 


	5. Chapter 5

When word of Lizzie’s witchy outbursts had spread, it had taken some time for her to recover her social standing. People watched her wherever she went and made sure to keep their distance as if she were a time bomb that could go off at any moment. She expected this time to be the same.

 

It was a surprise when the next morning, eyes to the scuffed floor to avoid meeting anyone’s stares on the way to breakfast, MG approached her. Usually, she expected his attention and adoration, but after what he’d seen her do, she thought that would be over.

 

“Vamps are having a meeting after classes are done for the day to talk about proposed curriculum changes. Since you’re one of us now, I thought you’d want to come.”

 

He was eager and energetic as usual, nothing in his demeanor to indicate he cared what she’d almost done.

 

She turned to him. She could feel the vulnerability in her expression, and as much as she tried, she couldn’t keep her voice from sounding desperate as she asked, “You don’t hate me?”

 

MG laughed, and she thought maybe it was some kind of sick joke, him being nice to her, because her question didn’t deserve derision.

 

“I think I’ve made it embarrassingly clear that I don’t hate you,” he said, tone still light.

 

”But…” She struggled to find the right way to describe the events of the prior evening, an outburst, an attack, a loss of control. “Yesterday?” She finally asked.

 

The smile dropped from his face; his expression softened to almost pity, and it was a new side of MG. He was usually the one receiving pity, after tripping over something obvious despite his vampire senses, or being rejected by a girl who didn’t deserve him.

 

Lizzie knew about MG’s crush on her. Like he said, he’d made it embarrassingly obvious. And it wasn’t that she hadn’t considered him that way, or like she was some mean girl stringing along the earnest nerd for fun. It was just that talking to MG often left her with the sensation that too long in her presence and he would be completely crushed. She preferred guys who were a little better at pushing back, who could handle her and all the baggage that came with her.

 

“Every vampire at this school has done something, or many things, they wish they hadn’t. It sucks, but it’s part of the territory. You’ll learn to control it. That’s what this school is for, right?”

 

He left her to get to English class, and she stood for a moment staring after him down that hallway. She wasn’t so sure she could believe what he’d said.

 

She’d spent her whole life practicing control, and still it seemed like the darkness controlled her.

 

~oOo~

 

Caroline closed the door behind her as she stepped into Ric’s office. She’d been supervising breakfast. After so much time spent tracking and recruiting new students while searching for a way to stop the merge, it felt normal just being an ordinary headmistress, even if it was over a school of supernatural children.

 

“We need to talk about our daughter,” she said, sitting in one of the chairs across the desk from him.

 

“Did Lizzie do something else?” He asked, exhaustion written in the lines on his face. With how involved he’d always been in the mystical going-one of Mystic Falls, it was easy to forget that he was mortal, but from the bags under his eyes and the increasing number of gray hairs on his head, Caroline was reminded.

 

“No, it’s actually-“ She cut herself off and started again. “Do you think Josie’s been acting strange?”

 

She hated even having to ask, hated that she spent so much time away from her daughters that she couldn’t be sure what was normal for them.

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Like is she not acting like herself, more up and down, you know, like-"

 

Alaric interrupted her, concern quickly following understanding in his expression, “more like Lizzie.”

 

“It could just be her feelings about Lizzie almost dying or becoming a vampire, or Lizzie’s enhanced vampire feelings going through the twin bond,” Caroline ran through the list of possibilities she’d been generating since she noticed Josie’s change in behavior, but they sounded frail, even to her.

 

“We have no reason to believe this has anything to do with the merge,” he agreed, his calm tone betrayed by the bottle and glass he pulled from the bottom drawer of his desk. He was getting older, but at least Caroline knew his tendency to handle problems with bourbon was a constant.

 

“You have another glass?” She asked, and he pulled one out for her, pouring her drink alongside his own.

 

She sipped it and tried not to wince at the way it burned. She’d never quite developed the taste for bourbon that her friends had. She was more of a margarita and screwdriver girl.

 

His knuckles around the glass were white from how tightly he was clutching it as he asked, “Did anything in your research say how a twin turning into a vampire would affect the merge?”

 

She shook her head and took another sip, understanding why Alaric was so fond of it, even without drinking enough to feel the effects. The burn was a nice temporary distraction from the thoughts that wouldn’t stop swirling. “Nothing but that in the case of siphoners, it wouldn’t stop it. As long as they’re still witches, they’ll have to merge.”

 

“But nothing about if it rushes the whole process in any way? Or if being a vampire guarantees that twin is stronger?”

 

“Our situation is kind of unprecedented. I mean, how many Gemini coven vampire-witch hybrids do you know besides Lizzie?”

 

Even as she spoke, Caroline followed that train of thought to the obvious, and completely terrible, answer. She hoped her expression successfully conveyed, “absolutely not,” as Alaric said out loud, “Only the one.”

 

“He’s locked in a prison world,” she hissed. “And for good reason.”

 

“I’m not saying we free him or even contact him, just that he’s an option.”

 

“So we keep an eye on Josie for anything concerning, and keep doing research, and hope it doesn’t come to asking him for help.”

 

“Sounds like a plan.” He poured himself another glass as Caroline left.

 

~oOo~

 

Every question on the test looked foreign to Josie. She vaguely remembered learning it; she’d studied it last night with MG and Hope. She never froze like this, but no matter how long she stared at the multiple choice options, nothing felt right. She couldn’t even imagine the essay portion at the end.

 

Her brain was buzzing, guilt and fear and confusion and hunger and anger tearing through it, muting the more helpful thoughts like who was the president during Reconstruction or how she was going to help Lizzie.

 

Since Lizzie became a vampire, all the emotions running through the twin bond were on overdrive. At first she hadn’t been able to distinguish her own thoughts and feelings from her sister’s, but over the past few days, she’d gotten better at knowing the difference. She was even starting to figure out how to push even Lizzie’s newly intense feelings to the back of her mind like she’d always done before her sister was a vampire.

 

It turned out that what was left, what actually belonged to her, wasn’t much better, and so the buzzing in her mind got louder.

 

There was the sadness, realizing her sister had almost died, and that she would never be the same.

 

There was the guilt at not looking after her better at the festival because of some stupid crush that wasn’t going to lead anywhere anyway.

 

There was the anger that the world seemed so determined to revolve around Lizzie. She was a vampire, and everyone’s attention was rightfully on that because Lizzie needed help, but it meant one again that no one was paying attention to her.

 

There was the second round of guilt following that anger.

 

She wanted to scream or cry or punch something.

 

Instead, she tried her best to circle answers that made sense and to BS her way through an essay, and to push all her own feelings back where Lizzie’s lived.

 

By the time she placed her test facedown on the teacher’s desk and pushed her way out of the classroom, her lungs burned like they hadn’t gotten air in hours. She did her best to steady her breath and keep her eyes ahead as she maneuvered through the crowded halls to an exit.

 

Fresh air would help her, or at the very least, get her away from the hordes of people and the magic coursing through the walls and floors and even air at the Salvatore school. Usually, it made her feel safe and strong and complete, but on days when everything came at her too fast, it felt suffocating.

 

She was so close to making her escape to the back gardens when Lizzie stopped her short, linking their arms and changing their direction. Josie tried to free herself, but Lizzie was strong.

 

“I feel like I’ve barely seen you today,” she said.

 

“I was in the library studying first thing this morning.” Josie tried to act normal, but it was hard to remember what that even was.

 

“Is everything okay?”

 

“Of course. How have you been?” Right, Josie remembered with a twinge of bitterness she shoved down with everything else, normal was deferring to Lizzie.

 

“You know the twin bond goes both ways. Somethings wrong.” Lizzie insisted.

 

Josie felt tears welling in her eyes, so she turned her gaze upward like there was something really interesting on the ceiling to keep them from spilling over.

 

“Sure you’re a vampire and even though Mom is back, I’ve hardly seen her at all and I just failed my history test, but everything is fine.” Josie heard her voice getting louder and sharper, could feel warmth where her arm connected to Lizzie’s, could feel herself pulling Lizzie’s power through it, could feel that power building like a fire inside of her.

 

“Breathe, Josie,” she heard Lizzie say, but it was like all the oxygen had been sucked from the air to fuel the fire she was growing, and she couldn’t breathe.

 

Lizzie’s arm started to gray where Josie was taking more power than she had available, and becoming aware of this, Lizzie untangled their arms and took a step back.

 

No longer drawing energy, the magic surged inside Josie, and she didn’t have to say anything for a tapestry hanging from the wall to burst into pale blue flames, for every tapestry lining the hallway to similarly catch fire, until she was standing inside and inferno with smoke growing so thick around her she couldn’t even see Lizzie, though she sensed her presence by her side.

 

Though the roar of flames made everything else sound far away, Josie thought she heard her mom’s voice insisting Lizzie get out and heard Lizzie’s fierce protest that gave way when she heard  _ the mom voice  _ which neither of them had ever been capable of arguing with. Then she heard her sister’s receding footsteps.

 

“Josie.” Her mom’s hand came down reassuringly on her shoulder, which was luckily covered by her cardigan and thus impossible to siphon through.

 

“I’m sorry.” She felt small and weak, caught in the fire she created.

 

“It’s okay. We just need to get outside before we get hurt.”

 

“I should make it stop.” Josie knew the spell that would put the fire out, but like the facts on her history test, she couldn’t remember it.

 

“Don’t worry about that. Your classmates are already working on it, but we need to get to safety. The nearest exit is blocked, and we have to get across the school as quickly as possible, so I’m going to pick you up and get you out of here, but you can’t siphon me when I do.”

 

The tone of her mom’s voice made Josie feel like a child, like when she was young and didn’t know how to control her magic, and her mom would just be endlessly patient and help her out of any situation she got herself into. She nodded as her mom swept her feet up and zipped across the building and out the front door.

 

She was unsteady on her feet, from the vamp speed and smoke and chaos inside her, when her mom put her down, and she was grateful that she didn’t let go completely because she was pretty sure she would have fallen.

 

It looked like the rest of the school was gathered on the front lawn, had made it out while she was spiraling.

 

Her dad saw them first, rushed out to meet them, wrapping his arms around Josie so she was wedged between both her parents in a way she hadn’t been in too long. Their warmth combined with the fresh air she’d been trying to get all along cleared the fog from her mind.

 

Lizzie quickly approached them too. She was paler than usual, and her cheeks were smudged with ash. The place on her arm that Josie had been siphoning from was still a sick gray color.

 

Josie was preparing to apologize for freaking out and putting her in danger and taking the attention she needed more, but she didn’t even get the chance to open her mouth before Lizzie was joining in on the hug, clinging even more tightly than either of their parents.

 

“I’m so sorry, Jo,” she whispered against her hair. “I should’ve known how you were feeling.”

 

Josie let the strength of her family hold her up until the building was cleared for re-entry.

 

~oOo~

 

Lizzie was pacing outside her and Josie’s room when Hope got to it.

 

“It took you long enough,” she huffed.

 

“You texted me literally a minute and a half ago.”

 

Hope had been painting the image she’d seen earlier before a teacher rushed her out of the building, of Josie surrounded by fire, only in the picture, she was controlling it with all the power Hope knew she possessed, when her phone had buzzed with a text from Lizzie.

 

Lizzie had asked her to try talking to Josie, and for all the things Hope and Lizzie disagreed about, Josie was the one they were completely on the same page for.

 

“She hasn’t said anything since the fire. I think she’s mad at me.”

 

Hope rolled her eyes at how classically  _ Lizzie _ it was to think this would be about her. Hope knew Josie well enough after all the years they’d known each other to figure she was probably more upset with herself than anything.

 

She opened the door to find Josie sitting up, wrapped in her blankets, reading a book. Upon closer inspection, she saw that it was a self help book about managing emotions. Emma had given her the same one after her parents’ died, and she suspected Josie had gotten this copy from her sister.

 

“Hey,” Hope said, sitting at the end of Josie’s bed.

 

Josie looked up and her lips turned up in the softest hint of a smile that had a blush heating Hope’s cheeks.

 

“Lizzie’s worried about you,” Hope said when Josie remained silent.

 

Josie shrugged.

 

“So what happened earlier?”

 

Josie shrugged again.

 

“You know you have every reason lately to be upset. No one blames you for feeling things.”

 

Josie shook her head and said in the quietest voice Hope had ever heard her use, “I don’t want to talk about it.” Her voice shook like she was on the verge of tears.

 

Hope moved to lean against the headboard next to Josie. She took the book and playfully prodded her shoulder. “Want to watch Brooklyn Nine-Nine then?”

 

Josie’s smile was a little wider as she pulled her laptop from her bedside table. “MG is going to be mad we started without him.”

 

“I think MG will manage,” Hope laughed. Before they pressed play, she called out to invite Lizzie to come watch with them, and Lizzie only glared at her for a second before agreeing.

 

~oOo~

 

Alaric knew what Caroline was going to say before she knocked on his door. He’d been sitting on the couch, waiting for her, thinking of ways to ease either of his daughters’ pain, thinking of ways to keep both of them alive.

 

“Being a parent sucks sometimes,” he greeted her.

 

“Yeah,” she agreed, joining him on the couch.

 

They were silent for a minute, until Caroline said what was on both their minds.

 

“We need to talk to Kai.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's wild how when I try to write original fiction, it takes me days to just get a few hundred words down, and once I sit down to write this, I end up with 2,000 in just a few hours.


	6. Chapter 6

They had fallen asleep watching TV, and when Josie woke up, Hope was gone. She left a note that she was training before class and to text if she needed anything. Josie smiled to herself at that last part.

 

The events of the previous day already felt like a sick dream to her, and she couldn’t say she minded that. The less she had to acknowledge the reality that she set her school on fire, the better.

 

Getting ready for class, choosing one of her favorite tops, which she insisted to herself was not because Hope had complimented it the last time she wore it, she almost felt like everything was normal, in the relative sense of the term for a Gemini Coven siphoner witch.

 

It was harder to push reality aside as she headed down the burnt corridor to Advanced Magical Healing. Ash still dusted the floor, and she didn’t think the scorch marks along the walls would ever fade.

 

“Hey,” Hope smiled as she rushed to catch up with Josie.

 

“How was training?”

 

“Sweaty.”

 

Josie tried not to picture that, Hope glistening with sweat, shirt clinging, gaze fierce and confident like she could take you down in a second with whatever weapon she was using, including her own hands. When the image popped into her mind anyway, Josie was skilled enough at denial to avoid admitting it was the hottest thing she could imagine.

 

“I ran into Kaleb on my way back to clean up,” she added. “A few people are going to a townie party tonight, and he invited us to join.”

 

“High school parties aren’t really my thing,” Josie said without fully turning down the offer. Maybe  _ not her thing _ was exactly what she needed.

 

“That’s exactly why we should go,” Hope replied, as if reading her mind.

 

“It  _ would _ be nice to pretend to be a normal rich private school kid like the town things we are.”

 

“Is that a yes?”

 

“I guess it is.”

 

Hope’s grin at her agreement heated up Josie’s face, and she was glad they had made it to class, where she sat a row in front of Hope, so the other girl couldn’t see the impact she had on her.

 

~oOo~

 

After Josie’s outburst yesterday, the vampire meeting MG mentioned had been rescheduled for this afternoon. Lizzie had debated all day whether to show her commitment by showing up early or her superiority by being late, and finally she just settled for arriving on time.

There were only a few vampires gathered when she walked into the library, clustered around Kaleb, chatting and passing the time until the meeting started.

 

“Lizzie, you made it,” MG announced her arrival to the group, none of whom looked as excited as he did to see her. Most, she noticed, looked downright annoyed.

 

“Of course.” She leaned against a table and faced Kaleb.

 

“We were just talking about a party a few of us are sneaking out to tonight,” MG told her.

 

“I still think it’s a bad idea. Dr. Saltzman is going to catch you, and you’ll all be washing dishes for a month,” a blonde vampire who Lizzie thought was named Brandon added.

 

“So are you in?” MG asked like it was a given she was invited.

 

“Obviously,” she rolled her eyes.

 

~oOo~

 

Josie was reading on her bed and Lizzie was digging through her wardrobe when Caroline and Alaric knocked on their door and came into their room.

 

Caroline sat on the edge of Lizzie’s bed, and Ric stood tensely, arms crossed.

 

“Family meeting,” Caroline announced, prompting Lizzie to join her on the bed and Josie to set her book down. Both of their eyes were wide as they waited for one of their parents to speak, and Caroline couldn’t help but remember them when they were much younger, hanging onto each of her or Ric’s words like they had all the answers.

 

She took a deep breath, preparing herself to be strong for her girls instead of terrified, like she had been all day.

 

“We wanted to check in on how you’re both doing, and let you know about some things we’ve been talking about,” she started.

 

Alaric nodded. “I know this last week has been hard, so we wanted to start by saying how proud we are of you, and how strong you are for managing as well as you have.”

 

“I don’t know if I’d call what we’re doing ‘managing well’,” Josie said, shrinking in on herself as she did. Caroline almost got up to be closer to her, but Lizzie beat her to it, moving to Josie’s bed and resting her head on her sister’s shoulder.

 

“You’re doing the best you can with an impossible situation,” Caroline said. “And we have some ways to try and help with that.”

 

“Josie, you’re going to start talking to Emma more regularly. You can’t keep hiding from your feelings, or what happened yesterday is going to keep happening,” Ric said. “You’re also going to be joining Lizzie for daily meditation, which your Mom is going to take over for me. And you’ll be able to retake the test from yesterday when you think you’re ready.”

  
“So I did fail?” Josie asked weakly.

 

Ric nodded slowly.

 

“What about me? How are we keeping me from going all out of control vampire?” Lizzie asked.

 

Caroline knew that most people would think Lizzie was being selfish, diverting the attention from her sister like she did, but with her head still on Josie’s shoulder, their hands clasped together, Caroline knew she did it for Josie. When the spotlight was too hot, Lizzie let it burn her so it wouldn’t hurt her sister.

 

Josie visibly relaxed at the diversion of the conversation from her.

 

“You’re going to start working with me every day on mastering control as a vampire, and with Emma on mastering control as a witch, and you’re going to be taking a break from witch classes to focus on the vampire curriculum,” Caroline answered.

 

Lizzie didn’t argue like Caroline had expected her to about switching completely to the vampire track. She knew how much being a witch was a part of her daughter’s identity, but learning to control her vampire side was the more immediate concern, especially while the necklace she wore kept her from practicing magic.

 

“Unfortunately, that’s not all,” Ric said after a moment had passed in silence. Josie looked up from where her eyes had wandered to her phone.

 

“I have to go out of town for a few days on school business. I know the timing is bad, but your mom is here to look after everything while I’m gone,” he said.

 

Josie’s lip quivered, but she was silent. Even before Caroline had been frequently absent from her kids’ lives, whenever Josie had had a problem, it was her dad she had sought for comfort. Lizzie went to Caroline, and Josie went to Ric.

 

She’d brought up that exact point when they’d argued about who should go after Kai in the prison world, but he’d insisted they both needed their mom. She could tell he really just wanted to protect her from Kai, and as much as Caroline could hold her own, she couldn’t blame him after what Kai had done to Jo.

 

“Really Dad?” Lizzie asked, voice dripping with scorn and disappointment. “Now?”

 

He sighed. “It’s urgent, or you know I wouldn’t go.”

 

“It’s fine,” Josie insisted, but the way her voice shook said something different.

 

~oOo~

 

All Hope could focus on was the emptiness in Josie’s face when she met them at the doorway. She was so caught up trying to figure out what was wrong without prying or upsetting her any more, that she didn’t notice at first when Landon approached and wrapped his arms around her from behind.

 

“Landon?” she asked, but she could tell that her voice wasn’t as enthusiastic as it should be.

 

“It’s me.”

 

“I didn’t know you were coming tonight.”

 

They started out along the driveway. To avoid getting caught, the people going to the party had separated into two groups. She was with Landon, Raf, Josie, Kaleb, and a few vamps she recognized but couldn’t name. They were going to the edge of campus, where the driveway met the road, so a friend of Kaleb’s could pick them all up. When they were dropped off, the friend would go back for the second group.

 

“Yeah, you didn’t ask,” Landon whispered, only a small note of bitterness in his voice.

 

“I’ve been busy.” It wasn’t like he could blame her for helping Josie with everything going on.

 

“Now’s not the time to talk about this,” he said, speeding his pace to catch up with Rafael.

 

“What does that even mean?” She called after him, but it was only a slightly louder whisper to avoid being caught, and the night swallowed it before it reached him.

 

“What was that about?” Josie asked, taking his place like she’d been waiting to all along. Hope smiled at the change in company.

 

“I really don’t know. But let’s just enjoy the night.”

 

“I’m with you on that.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally had to force myself to stop here because I'm so excited to write the next chapter, but I have to keep up with my responsibilities. Also curious how people feel about MG/Lizzie because I didn't think I shipped it, but my writing seems to say something different, so comment if you have an opinion either way


	7. Chapter 7

Josie had been holding a red solo cup of a drink Raf had mixed for her for the fifteen minutes they’d been at the party, but she had yet to even try a sip. 

 

They were at a clearing in the woods surrounded by more people than comfortably fit in the area. A bonfire was going near the middle, and most people were gathered around it, or gathered around the keg that was next to it.

 

She stood off to the side in a circle that had begun as just the kids from the Salvatore School, but had lost and gained members so now she and Hope were the only people not from Mystic High.

 

Despite all of Hope’s antisocial tendencies at school, she was making conversation with the townies like it was the easiest thing in the world. She didn’t have the same reservations as Josie about drinking, and her face was already beginning to flush red, her laugh becoming less contained.

 

Landon was hovering just outside the circle like he didn’t want to intrude, watching Hope with a kind of sadness that Josie couldn’t understand. If Hope was with her, she didn’t know if she’d ever be able to be sad again.

 

She could understand feeling invisible, though.

 

“Landon, Tessa was just telling us about her band,” Josie said, inviting him into the conversation. “Tessa, Landon’s really good at guitar.”

 

“I wouldn’t say really. Or good,” he said, stepping in closer, but Josie missed the rest of the encounter. She was too distracted by Kaleb’s friend pulling up with the second group of Salvatore School kids, too distracted by who was stepping out of the car.

 

She mumbled something about needing to check on someone and was pushing through the party to get to Lizzie.

 

“What are you doing here?” she hissed. “Shouldn’t you be avoiding temptation?”

 

Lizzie rolled her eyes as MG said, “The vamps are looking out for her tonight. It’ll be fine.”

 

“And no drinking,” Lizzie added. “Of any kind.”

 

Josie searched for the place inside where she could feel Lizzie the strongest, and she had to admit, there was no cause for concern. There was no anger, no sadness, no mania. Nothing extreme was brewing.

 

Her sister probably needed a normal night just as much as she did.

 

“Okay,” she agreed. “But Hope is here, so maybe steer clear if you don’t want to risk being sire bonded into something you don’t want to do.”

 

Lizzie sighed. “Of course she is.”

 

Then she was grabbing MG’s arm and pulling him over to where people were dancing, and Josie let them go.

 

She downed her drink which tasted  _ strong _ , and made her way back to the circle she’d just left. The same group was gathered, only absent two members - Landon and Hope.

 

~oOo~

 

“Can we not do this here?” Landon asked.

 

A fire was stirring inside Hope, that was only partially due to the two shots she had taken with a girl from Mystic Falls, and was more to do with Landon’s dismissiveness earlier.

 

“You’re mad at me, and I want to know why,” she pressed.

 

Landon was irritatingly calm.

 

“I’m not mad.”

 

“Well I am,” she said.

 

~oOo~

 

Lizzie didn’t need alcohol to enjoy a party. The bass of the music, so loud it drowned out her words and her thoughts, and the crowds of anonymous people in which she was also anonymous, was enough for her at the moment. She wasn’t an out of control witch-vampire hybrid, but an ordinary teenage girl.

 

A circle of kids watched MG who was doing some impressive break dancing moves, and Lizzie felt a laugh bubble up in her when he gestured for her to join.

 

“I don’t know if my dance style goes with this type of music,” she yelled, but he just gestured again.

 

She joined him in the center, exaggeratedly tap dancing to prove her point until he was laughing too.

 

A rush went through her as the circle dissolved into the typical chaos of a dance floor, and it felt wrong. It wasn’t the joy or satisfaction of her own emotions, nor was it the quiet anxiety of Josie that was slowly melting away.

 

It was a rush of power colored by anger, and Lizzie thought she recognized it’s source, but she couldn’t understand how it was crashing inside her. She visualized it disappearing into the necklace until she felt it fizzle inside her.

 

~oOo~

 

“Fine,” Landon said, the slightest note of anger finally coming through. “I think we should break up.”

 

Hope blanched. She’d known Landon was upset with her, but she didn’t think it had gone so far. When the shock wore away, she was surprised to find herself distinctly  _ not  _ heartbroken, maybe a little insulted, and even somewhat guilty, but behind all of that was relief.

 

Landon seemed to read her expression as he said, “That’s why.”

 

She shook her head, confused. “I really did have feelings for you. I don’t know what happened.”

 

His laugh at that was only a little bitter.

 

“Does that laugh mean  _ you  _ know?” She asked, already moving again toward anger.

 

As way of answer, he glanced at Josie, hovering by the keg and chatting with a boy in a letterman jacket.

 

“You think I’m into Josie?”

 

~oOo~

 

For once, Lizzie didn’t mind not being the center of attention. She was enjoying listening to the conversations flowing around the bonfire, the conversations of normal teenagers, about hard classes and hot teachers and sports rivalries.

 

“Eavesdropping skills,” MG commented. “Major perk of vampirism.”

 

Lizzie nodded, but before she had the chance to respond, she felt a burning in her stomach, as if she  _ had _ been drinking, and she had to run to the edge of the clearing to retch, though her stomach was empty and only brought up bile.

 

MG waited at a polite distance until she struggled to stand, and then he was at her side, holding her up.

 

“What’s happening?” he asked.

 

The burning had spread upward into her chest then her throat, but as she leaned against MG’s side, it stopped in its tracks, like it had found what it was looking for and she held in a scream as a spot on her neck burned from the inside out.

 

~oOo~

 

Landon was right, Hope thought in a muddled, fuzzy way.

 

When she’d walked away, the mere idea of being into Josie completely foreign to her, she’d joined Kaleb at the table of drinks.

 

“Landon and I broke up,” she’d said casually, and just as casually, he’d handed her a bottle of Fireball which she’d taken a swig from, then another, and a few more.

 

It was hitting her now though, the Fireball, and the truth in what Landon had said.

 

Every time she saw Josie, her world got a little brighter. When Josie laughed, Hope’s heart fluttered. When Josie sent a smile her way, which happened a lot lately, Hope’s heart skipped a full beat.

 

Hope knew that she thought about Josie more than might be normal. She thought about how to make her smile or laugh, thought about how to protect her from the monsters still coming after the school, thought about how to make everyone she came in contact with see the wonderful parts of her that Josie had taken to hiding. She’d never stopped to consider why she might want all of it, or what that might mean.

 

Now, it was all she could think about.

 

Josie was illuminated by the bonfire, all warmth and beauty, and Hope imagined herself marching over to her, wrapping her arms around her, and kissing her. She didn’t even have time to realize how much she wanted that before she was doing it, before Josie was pressed against her, lips firm against hers, their hands tangled in each other’s hair.

 

Everywhere they touched was fire that burned through Hope, and she felt a smile break across her face. She pulled away, and Josie pulled her back in for a short kiss, a reassurance that the feeling was mutual, then they were both laughing. Hope pressed her forehead against Josie’s and whispered between laughs, “Landon and I broke up.”

 

It wasn’t until many more laughs and sloppy, drunken kisses that Hope realized the power that usually filled her when her emotions were strong like this was gone. She was used to pushing it down and keeping control until she barely had to notice it, until containing her power was as much a part of herself as the power itself, but this was different.

 

It was like power was draining from her as quickly as she was generating it.

 

~oOo~

 

Even as Lizzie realized the burning was targeting the necklace, she refused to take it off. She could manage the pain if it kept people safe from her.

 

“I think something’s going on with the sire bond,” she gasped out through the pain.

 

MG scanned the clearing.

 

“I can’t see Hope,” he said. “Or Josie.”

 

“Shit,” Lizzie replied as the comforting weight around her neck dissolved and the burning ceased.

 

~oOo~

 

“Shit,” Hope said, stepping away from Josie to clear her mind. “I think there’s more to the sire bond than we realized.”

 

They needed to get to Lizzie to stop whatever was happening, but Hope didn’t get a chance to take even a step before she was brought to her knees by what felt like a vacuum pulling all the power from her in an instant.

 

A percussive boom rocked the clearing simultaneously to Hope’s power loss, shaking all trees, dropping a few, fanning the fire, then putting it out.

 

Hope couldn’t sort the screams of pain from the screams of fear as the party erupted into chaos.

 

~oOo~

 

MG staggered to his feet.

 

He’d been holding Lizzie up as her teeth were clenched in pain, and he’d seen the moment her expression eased, when the necklace at her throat fell away and dissolved into ash, and a wave of force exploded from Lizzie, knocking them both to the ground.

 

He meant to help Lizzie up beside him and track down Hope and Josie to do damage control, but his senses were drawn to a tree that had fallen in the blast and the unmistakable scent of blood.

 

Veins already thrumming with adrenaline, he couldn’t control the prickling darkness under his eyes. He was overwhelmed with the need to drink, and sparing a glance at Lizzie who seemed similarly fighting for control, he sped to the fallen tree and the boy whose leg was crushed under it.

 

There were other kids bleeding, scraped by tree branches or knocked to the ground. His focus would shift to them when he was done, when the boy was drained. Even as that thought was disgusting him, he was sinking his fangs into the boy and hearing his cry die out.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the hiatus! I've been spending more time working on my original works, but I'm not giving up on this; I promise. Hopefully back to weekly updates from here on out, or at least every other week, but who knows.

The humanity switch was basically the first lesson vampires learned at the Salvatore School, what it was, the consequences of flipping it. Lizzie hadn’t been a vampire long enough to even get the official lesson, but she’d heard enough anyway to not want to do it.

 

It had always been presented as a choice: a vampire facing overwhelming pain choosing not to feel it anymore, like her mom had done when her grandmother died.

 

Standing in the wreckage she’d created, the coppery stench of blood overpowering, her clothes sticky with it, turning off her humanity wasn't a choice; it was an instinct.

 

One moment, guilt and fear and loss were tearing her apart, the worst pain she had even known, magic growing inside her, threatening to crest again, taking with it anyone who had survived the first wave; the next, cool clarity calmed her racing heart.

 

MG kneeled beside her, eyes flicking the clearing on instinct, like a predator, for signs of any living creature left, even while his body was wracked with silent sobs.

 

Lizzie placed her hand against his shoulder in a facsimile of comfort, leaning to whisper in his ear.

 

“Turn it off,” she said.

 

His face was splattered with the bright red of fresh blood when he turned it up to her, eyes wide in shock.

 

“But-”

 

“What? It’ll turn us unto murder machines? We already are. But I feel more in control than I’ve ever felt. Don’t you want to be in control, Milton?”

 

She knew it had worked when his despairing gaze settled into calm indifference, a smile slowly spreading across it.

 

“What now?” He asked

 

~oOo~

 

If moments ago, Josie had been tipsy and unfocused, all of that was gone now.

 

Most of the kids from Mystic High had run when the clearing shook, probably believing it had been some kind of bomb, which Josie supposed, wasn’t too far from the truth.

 

The Salvatore School vampires had gone when the smell of blood became overpowering, so even Josie with her mortal senses could detect it. Kaleb had promised to get Caroline to deal with whatever was happening, so Josie waited.

 

She hadn’t yet emerged from the woods where she and Hope had been hidden away when Lizzie went off; she was too afraid of what she might see. The feelings, or rather lack of feelings from where she always sensed her sister didn’t give her much cause for optimism.

 

“Everyone except Lizzie and MG is accounted for back at school,” Hope said, returning to Josie’s side, expression guarded and unreadable, all traces of her early intoxication gone.

 

“What happened?”

 

Josie wasn’t sure she wanted the answer.

 

“Something with the sire bond, like all my power funneled into Lizzie and overwhelmed her.”

 

“So that was the explosion?”

 

“Yeah. Some people got hurt by falling branches or trees, and from the looks of it, one of the vampires smelled the blood and lost control.”

 

“MG,” Josie guessed. “He has some… impulse control issues.”

 

“Maybe. Your mom is talking to Sheriff Donovan right now about covering all this up. She asked me to ask you to wait in the car.”

 

Josie thought she might be in shock because there was no fear or guilt or horror coursing through her after everything she’d just seen and everything Hope had told her, just emptiness. She nodded and silently followed Hope to the car.

 

The other girl kept shooting her worried glances as they waited, but Josie couldn’t find anything to say that would reassure her that she was fine that wouldn’t come across completely untrue.

 

When her mom finally got in the car, with a tired sigh, Josie finally spoke up.

 

“Lizzie turned off her humanity.” She didn’t temper it with  _ I think  _ or use any sort of questioning tone. She knew what the cold in the pit of her stomach meant.

 

Caroline snapped around to face her daughter.

 

“Why would she do that?”

 

Josie didn’t answer. She didn’t know.

 

She couldn’t imagine any pain great enough to give up her soul for.

 

~oOo~

 

As soon as they pulled into the driveway of the Salvatore School, Hope bolted to the woods to turn. She needed the clarity of her wolf form, the simplicity of not having to think.

 

Everything that had happened had been her fault.

 

She had let herself have a night of freedom, of pretending to be normal, had let herself have a moment of unbridled happiness, and now kids were dead. Lizzie and MG were missing. The Salvatore School was on shaky ground with the authorities of Mystic Falls.

 

She was a conduit for destruction.

 

When the moon began to fall, Hope forced herself back into human form, marched to Caroline’s door and entered without knocking.

 

The headmistress’s head was in her hands, everything in her posture weary and defeated, from the slope of her shoulders to the bags under her eyes when she raised her head at Hope’s entrance.

 

“The sire bond is a sharing of power,” Hope said, forgoing a polite greeting. “I should’ve felt it so much sooner, but I wasn’t paying attention. Lizzie did everything right. It was my power that went out of control.”

 

“Why don’t you sit,” Caroline suggested, scrubbing a hand down her face. “And explain.”

 

So Hope did, telling her about the drinking and the fight with Landon, leaving out only her kiss with Josie as something she wanted to just be theirs for the time being. She explained the way her powers hadn’t been bubbling under the surface for once, and how they’d felt like they were completely sucked from her in an instant.

 

“It’s like when she doesn’t have an external source of power to siphon, the sire bond becomes that source,” she finished.

 

“It’s why the bond doesn’t have any effects here,” Caroline mused. “She siphons from the school instead of the bond.”

 

“I’m so sorry.”

 

Hope felt hot tears on her cheeks, and before she had the chance to brush them away, Caroline’s arms were around her, strong and comforting. Despite all the unique ways Hope had made life hard for her, despite everything she had on her plate with her own children, she still rubbed soothing circles into her back.

 

“It’s not your fault,” she insisted.

 

~oOo~

 

Alaric had checked every corner of the small prison world, every hiding place and dark alley. After hours of searching, he left the prison world, exhaustion sunk so deep into him it felt like he would soon be made of it.

 

He’d sought an enemy for help, and found something far more disturbing than answers.

 

Caroline’s phone rang three times before she picked up, sounding every bit as tired as he felt. 

 

“Good news?” She asked with desperate hope.

 

“Really bad,” he answered. “Kai isn’t in the prison world. He’s on the loose.”

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written something like this, just for fun, without any sort of real plan, in a hot second. I don't know how long or good or consistent this will be, but I wanted to write it, so here it is. I love comments, so send me your love, hate, suggestions, theories, etc.


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